We Do Not Take Counsel From Our Fears

"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7

One of my favorite classes was the day we went to the campus ropes course. Even though we read about the narrator in Island of the Blue Dolphins taking on new challenges for years, I wasn't quite prepared for what happened in class. I thought about survival and challenge. I hoped for some class discussion, at least. I was even prepared to ride the giant swing. Though I consider myself terrified of heights, I had done that before and even enjoyed it. I had a plan for my survival.

Bailey Anderson and I chatted while rallying our classmates on the swing. I took my own turn on the swing, and it was almost easy. Whew, I was done.

I spent time taking photos and cheering on others. You can see them in this slide show.

McKenzie Romrell came to me as she was preparing to climb the 40-foot tower: "Kelli, I need you to cheer me on." I was surprised, but she was adamant she wanted to hear my voice. I just me this girl three weeks ago! How cool was it that she trusted me that much? McKenzie did a really great job getting all the way to the top, and I was happy to watch from firm ground.

Then suddenly, during the last half hour of class, the Spirit spoke to my heart: "You're not here to do what you're comfortable with." Oh, snap. That meant I had to climb the tower. I didn't want to, but otherwise I would regret ignoring a prompting and using this opportunity to grow.

Jenny Wadsworth enthusiastically encouraged me, and promised to save my life as my belayer. My nerves started jumping, but I strapped myself into a harness and went up. The easy way. After just a short portion, I started to panic. Jenny told me later she panicked, thinking it would take me half an hour to climb the rest of the tower. Luckily she didn't show any of that, and with lots of encouraging shouts I turned to look upward.

I am forever grateful for Sister Susan Grant, who, climbing just above me, smiled and cheered me from above. I don't know if I couldn't have done it alone, but I can say that it strengthened me for another day. Next time I had an opportunity to climb the tower, I did it alone, and I think that was possible because Sister Grant got me through it the first time.

I was so proud of my conquest! I'm still terrified of heights, but I managed. I may never do it again. But I may not have to.

Rather, I realized how much fear I harbor in all parts of my life: injuries, friendships, school work, church callings. There are plentiful opportunities for each of us to grow, but that means being outside our comfort zone. And for most of us, there's fear involved.

President James E. Faust said, "Let us not take counsel from our fears." Faith is the opposite of fear. I hope we all learn to live by faith, not fear.

Kelli Kitchen